Living For More

Many years ago I had a “pregnancy scare”. At that time, while living a life away from my faith, if I had seen a positive test result, I thought there was only one option – abortion. I never saw that positive reading, so thankfully I never went down that road. But I still vividly remember the all-consuming fear. ⁣

It was only just over a year ago that I held a baby for the first time. I’ve never really been around babies or children. They were like little aliens to me – I had no idea how to interact with a small human. I would be my most awkward self around kids. But I was curious to understand better why people fussed over them so much. ⁣

As the woman who still thought about that scare, and genuinely didn’t know how to feel about children, I was searching for something that told me “yes, you could be a mother.” ⁣

While living here in Brisbane, I’ve been able to observe many beautiful families and my perspective has shifted. Their interactions have really changed what I once negatively assumed children to be (and only be) – needy, annoying, loud, dream-killing and like life is over once you have them. ⁣

Okay, so needy, loud and annoying are accurate descriptions at times… but so much of my picture was incomplete. I’d never seen how much joy parents have – they exude a very real definition of love. I never saw how the smallest of interactions with children can make your heart melt or see the world in a new way because of their innocence. ⁣

I’ve seen people’s dreams come to life with so much more meaning because they now have children that are a part of that picture. ⁣

I know becoming a mother will be all kinds of challenging – I don’t have blinkers on. But personally, I think the common narrative leaves out how incredible having children can be – that your life isn’t over – you begin living for more. ⁣

More than yourself. ⁣

When I sat in that fear, I’d never heard of more. Another choice didn’t exist, because in my mind, positivity or possibility also didn’t exist. ⁣

I know personally, I love hearing from families who share the raw and real realities of parenthood, but also why the challenges are worth it and why their children are a gift. A positive narrative needs to be the prominent one. A much louder one. Or I don’t think we’ll ever treasure new life as we should.

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