I don’t think I can adequately define this, but if I could only use one word to describe what my life feels like right now – it would be strange.
I’m right smack bang in the middle of a transition period. I’m still present in what has been my “normal”, while also waiting and preparing for a new chapter and big changes that are so close I can almost taste them.
I never thought I would travel. I have never dreamed of overseas locations like most people do. I can’t really explain why – I just never pictured it or prioritised it and wrote it off as impossibly expensive.
But I’m leaving the place I have called home for over six years, and jumping on a plane to move to a city (and continent) I’ve never been to. All because I’ve felt the tug on my heart that that’s exactly what I need to do.
I don’t have much figured out, other than full trust and peace that God is placing me exactly where I need to be. Living out this faith continues to blow my mind – so much change can happpen in such little time. If one year ago I told myself this was what I was going to do… without hesitation I would have looked at myself with judgmental eyes saying “you’re insane”.
Sometimes choices are incredibly simple. I’m doing this simply because I need to. I need to experience an entirely new environment. I need to embrace an opportunity with arms wide open. I need to put my entire trust in my faith and I need to be bolder and step out of character.
This transition period is a really strange place. Its completely unfamiliar territory, and my patience is yet tested in a whole new way.
I know the journey (literally) is a very large part of this move. Landing and stepping off the plane in London is what I’ve been preparing for. But what I didn’t anticipate was that this transition period, slowing stepping out of comfortable into the complete unknown; completely letting go of what I know is what is pushing me to grow. There are incredible people that wouldn’t blink an eye at this change, and if you’re one of these people, full respect to you – seriously.
When I made the choice to move, it was a decision that was made with a lot of peace. Peaceful doesn’t necessarily mean comfortable. But there was no doubt, no fear and no anxiety. And there still isn’t, which is the most phenomenal feeling. I have definitely been overwhelmed at times by the sheer volume of life admin and things that need to fall into place, but none of that has made me question if I should be doing this.
I think that’s a large part of how we know God is present in what we’re stepping into. When we fully embrace that no matter where a new path leads, that we will not be alone, forsaken or forgotten – the pressure lifts. The waiting and build-up has taught me more than I ever anticipated. I like to think that God has a sense of humour, and its probably been quite amusing for Him having known all along what this would look like, and knowing all that is still ahead of me. All I know is that more than anything else – I need Him.
Leaning into my faith changes everything. My faith gives me strength. It makes me confident and bold. It brings out the very best version of myself and diminishes fear. I don’t need to have every step mapped out and planned. I don’t need to be defined by a specific job title. I don’t need to earn a top salary or have X funds in my bank account. I don’t need very many possessions. These things all mean so little.
I just need to listen, be entirely willing and have an open heart. Feeling that deep peace is enough. That’s what I’m trusting and leaning into.
Heres to change.